Three is not my favorite age. Case in point:
Mom: Lexi, please put on your swimming suit. Your lesson is pretty soon.
Lexi: NO! I'm NOT going to swimming lessons today!
[Insert 20 minutes of screaming and banging on my bedroom door while I take a shower and get ready for the day.]
Mom: Hey, you put on your swimming suit!
Lexi: (Crossing arms, glaring and snarling) Because I wanted to. Hmph. But I'm NOT swimming.
Mom: OK, but remember: if you want to watch TV later, you have to participate in swimming lessons.
Lexi: But I don't LIKE privileges! I'm not going!
Mom: Really? I thought you liked your shows.
Lexi: I am just going to put my FEET in the water! And wear my swimming suit like THIS! (Pulls the shoulder straps off and shoves the neckline down around her waist.)
Mom: You have to do everything your teacher asks if you want electronics privileges today.
Lexi: I WON'T DO FLOATS!
Mom: Even the floats, Lexi.
Lexi: You're the meanest mom EVER! I'm telling Dad on you!
Lexi: When he gets home from work, you're getting a time-out!
Mom: I love you, Lexi.
Lexi: I HATE you!
After enjoying the exchange above (and remaining calm; do I get a gold star?), I fetched Gavin from the basement and herded children to the van. But I couldn't find my keys. I did not remain calm about that, and finally gave up looking for them at 9:40. Lessons started at 9:30. I later found them on the counter under a t-shirt.
Happy Monday, everyone. Happy Monday.