May 13, 2010

On the naughty list

Gavin at 8 months

Last night I was trying to conjure up memories of a simpler time, a calmer time. I found this delicious picture of Gavin, comfortably cradled in a clean car seat, playing quietly with a toy. I took this picture on a day when we were traveling from Colorado to Nevada. He was such a gem on that trip, and such a sweet, happy baby at that time of life.

Almost two years later, I am completely at the end of my rope with this boy. Granted, daily life with a house on the market is stressful, and the other three kids make their own colorful contributions. But Gavin -- oh, Gavin! -- is wearing me out.

Shall I list some of this week's antics for posterity? Perhaps his posterity (should he survive long enough to have a posterity) will enjoy knowing a few of the naughty things their daddy did...
  • Shoved smooshed bananas into a subwoofer
  • Smeared a stick of butter all over the kitchen, floor, armoire, dry-clean-only curtains, back porch, and himself
  • Learned to unbuckle his booster seat (the one at the table)
  • Learned to unbuckle the seat belt holding his car seat in place (in the van)
  • Learned to unbuckle the seat belt of the child sitting next to him in the van
  • Learned to open the baby gates
  • Sprayed three downstairs windows and the washer with Spray-n-Wash
  • Transferred a clean, dry load of clothes back to the washer and started it
  • Pooped in a puzzle box
  • Peed on the kitchen floor
  • Put two spoons in two different milk jugs
  • Screamed that he hated me
  • Started calling his brothers naughty names
  • Climbed on top of the fridge
  • Took 47 pictures with my camera
  • Locked himself in the van, and later in the car, and later in the house
  • Escaped through the backyard into the green way behind our house
  • Used my toothbrush to clean the shower
  • Smeared red lip balm on my clean sheets
  • Pulled half a roll of tape out of the dispenser and stuck it all over his sister
  • Fed enough doggie treats to my friend's dog to give the poor thing diarrhea
This is by no means an exhaustive list (even for this week), but after typing for five minutes I'm exhausted.

I have been trying to offer Gavin lots of one-on-one time. He doesn't want to read a book, or play a game, or work a puzzle, or watch a show. He doesn't want to wear clothing. He just wants to run around naked, and get into things, and treat people badly. It's all I can do to contain and protect and clean up....not to mention all of the other things I need to do in a day.

Thankfully, Gavin will nap. For two blessed hours each day, I have a sanity break (at least from him). Zach napped until he was almost six. Dare I hope that this child might follow his brother's pattern? I think we're both going to need it.


O'Loughlin Family said...

"pooped in a puzzle box" That's great when reading it from this far away.

The Wizzle said...

I have to confess, "pooped in a puzzle box" gave me a chuckle too. But then I frowned extra sternly on your behalf.

Can you arrange to be out of the house a lot? That way at least he can destroy someone else's habitat.

Reynolds Family said...

3 cheers for the pooping antic! I cannot believe he did this all in one week. I'm not sure if any of my kids have done all that in all of their toddlerdom. You are a saint and will be rewarded greatly I'm sure for your endurance. Good thing he's cute, eh?

runningfan said...

Rachel, being out with Gavin is infinitely more stressful! At home, I'm the only one he affects. But out in public, it's humiliating to me and harmful to others. No, thanks!

granny said...

Your ticket to the celestial kingdom.

kendra said...

Maybe it's the two year old... maybe it's the third boy in a row of boys our boys' ages... maybe it's the younger sister.... all I know is there are WAY too many similarities between Isaac and Gavin... I should put this on my blog - Isaac actually tried to cook himself an egg. seriously. and I have yet to get through just one trip to the grocery store since he turned two without him yelling, "no I'm not going with you!" and laying spread eagle in the aisle. Oh MAN I feel your pain!! Maybe we should lock them in a room together until they're 4.... just a thought!

Princesa said...

Wow! If it's any consolation, I've heard worse. There was an hermana on my mission that had a son that age that cracked a dozen eggs all over the kitchen. Every day all it was terror. His name was Ivan and she called him Ivan the terrible. Kind of cute now looking back. Hopefully you can say that in the near future. Does Love and Logic work at all for him? I wish I could help. No fun, especially when you are stressed about the house. Maybe it's way of dealing with the stress?

Colleen said...

Oh, Heidi! You need a massage and a night out! I can take care of the night out. Shall we go have dessert, nice, chocolatey, fattening, comforting dessert together? Josh peed in a cup when he was around 3. And Luke can't leave his penis alone since he started potty training. It's driving me batty!

Adri said...

Oh, Heidi! Do you hate me that I'm giggling? Someday you'll laugh, too. Maybe in 10 years or so.

Grandma said...

Sounds like you need to pass him off to the relatives for a breather. I'll see what I can do to give you a break when I visit. Hang in there until then if you can!

Lisa Romer Keele said...

It makes me so happy to know that my little girl isn't the only one that does naughty things! He is adorable!!!

pass it on!

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