If you thought I had five children, you were wrong. I actually have six. The sixth child's name is Notme.
Notme is very, very busy. He (sometimes she) is conveniently invisible and thereby immune to all responsibility and punishment. S/he gets away with a lot of dumb stuff around here, like...
- Putting clean clothes and folded socks in the dirty clothes hamper
- Pouring goldfish crackers down the stairs
- Leaving the freezer door open
- Leaving the lights on in the van (two jumps in 24 hours, thankyouverymuch)
- Smearing toothpaste all over the mirror/counter/sink/wall/toilet
- Peeing all over the wall/floor/shower curtain/toilet
- Leaving crumbs in my bed
- Eating peanut butter from the jar in my bed
- Strewing the couch cushions and pillows all over the family room
- Licking the window
- Giving Kate the bottle of floor cleaner
- Parking a bike/scooter/stroller/wagon behind the van
- Taking dishes into the backyard
- Flicking the milk lid across the room
- Moving a sibling's car seat to a different location in the van
- Forgetting homework assignments altogether or until the last second
I think that tomorrow night, Notme will be the only kid who gets dessert...but only if s/he fesses up.